I can’t know for sure exactly what the situation is between you and the girlfriend who broke up with you. I don’t know how long it has been since you broke up, or since you last talked to her. Is she angry at you? Is she already seeing someone else? Do you have children together? These are all things I don’t know.
But I do know this: if you want to win your girlfriend back, you have to approach it systematically. You have to make a plan, and stick with it. This is what works.
What doesn’t work is to keep trying the same bad methods over and over. Texting her 100 times until she calls you back? Bad idea. Emailing her repeatedly, saying the same thing all the time? Also a bad idea. Knowing where she’s at and showing up there? That’s stalking her, man. Not a good idea. So if you can’t do that, what should you do instead? Like I said, you need a plan. Depending on how much time you want to spend, you can follow either the short-term or the long-term plan.
The short-term plan to win your girlfriend back goes like this:
Go two weeks having no contact with her.
I know you’re saying, “Two weeks! That’s not short term!”
But really, it is. Two weeks will allow time for your situation to come to a resting point. Your relationship will slip into your ex girlfriend’s long term memory. The bad stuff that caused her to dump you will merge with the good stuff from when you were together and happy.
After two weeks, write her a letter.
This letter has to be handwritten, and sent through the mail. That is the most personal form of communication, the kind of communication appropriate for what you want to say. In the letter, you want to say two things: apologize for whatever you did that caused her to break up with you, and also, agree with the breakup. Say that you’re sorry, that you understand why she doesn’t want to be with you any more, and that you agree separating is a good idea.
Wait and see if you hear back from her.
How long should you wait? Well, give her 5 days before you decide what to do next.
If you hear from her within 5 days, that’s a good sign. If she’s actually willing to spend time with you again, this soon, then you can start to seduce her into your arms just like you would with a new girl. But what if the signs are bad? What if she replies within 5 days but her reply is unfriendly, or what if she doesn’t reply at all?
Then, you have to wait out another full two weeks (including those first 5 days) before you write her again. Send a second letter, also handwritten, and tell her you miss her and you’d like to see her. In the second letter, don’t mention anything negative, like the reason why she broke up with you. Don’t bring up any old issues or arguments. Just say “Hi,” and “I’ve been thinking of you,” and “I’d like to see you again. Will you call me?” Because a month has gone by with no contact except for the first letter, she will be much more receptive this time.
When you resume communication with your girlfriend, it’s easy to make mistakes. To avoid doing that, you should also explore this list of what NOT to do, if you want to get your girlfriend back: 9 Ways to fail to get her back
And if you’re truly serious about getting your girlfriend back, you should get a complete book on the subject. I recommend a book called The Magic of Making Up. I like it because of its focus on relationship psychology, and particularly female psychology.
Understanding the psychology of relationships is a key factor in getting your girlfriend back. Plus, there’s the psychology of coping with your own feelings of rejection, shame and depression — emotions that also need to be dealt with.
Read this sneak peek at The Magic of Making Up to learn what’s in The Magic of Making Up that makes it worth the money, and you’ll see why I say its author has a good grasp of psychological tactics — including separate tactics for women and men.
You’ll also want to click here to look at the author’s own Magic of Making Up home page. Read his story, and then towards the bottom of the page be sure to click his button for downloading the book, so you can get started on getting your girlfriend back today!
We are dedicated to helping you do just that. Whether you want to get back with your ex girlfriend, or get your boyfriend back — we have the best, no-nonsense advice to help you plan your attack. Let us help you get your lover back!