If you find yourself in a frustrating situation where your husband is not as committed to the marriage as you are, don’t give up hope. There are ways to salvage the relationship on your own.
A marriage can fall apart for various reasons. Sometimes it can be as the result of an affair or it can be as simple as growing apart and losing communication. In both cases the marriage ends up in a crisis situation. If you are determined to save your marriage and your husband isn’t, there are still things you can do to help put the spark back into the relationship. You must also understand that many other couples are in the same situation and some of these marriages do get revitalized.
While it isn’t going to be easy, it will be worth the effort. After trying the following suggestions you will have a better idea whether it is worth it to continue to fight for your marriage.
1. Better yourself
The stronger you can become the better able you will be to confront the situation on your own. You need strength in order to give of yourself. Keep yourself healthy and nurtured so that you can give everything you have to fix up the relationship.
You may find during this process that your husband has a new respect for you. Your husband may be feeling hidden guilt for the relationship and what it has done to you. By taking the time to become a stronger person you’ll be showing that you still care about yourself enough to give back to the marriage. You’ll also find out if you have been carrying any hidden resentment about your own lack of nurturing for yourself.
2. Reinforce your commitment
If you are seriously committed to salvaging your marriage you will need to remind yourself of this commitment in order to stay focused. You’ll have to find your own inner strength and rely on it on a daily basis.
By reinforcing your commitment you’ll find the power you need to carry on. There may be times when you feel like giving up yourself, and this is when it is important to remember how committed you really are.
3. Build on the friendship
Look at your husband as you would your best friend. Have you been giving all the support that is necessary when your husband needs it? Have you been treating your partner as well or better than a good friend? These are the things you will need to examine. It is easy to lose sight of your husband with the routine of day to day living and your husband may be feeling only second best.
A lot of marriages fall apart because one spouse has completely forgotten what it takes to be a friend to the other. If there is no friendship between the two of you, how can you really expect your marriage to prosper?
By building up the friendship in your relationship you’ll be able to reassess your marriage and see where it actually stands. Some things may stand out that you didn’t see before and by correcting them you may find that your marriage has a better foundation to build upon.
The most important thing you need to remember is that you cannot control your husband , but you can have control over your own actions. You can lead the marriage by becoming a positive example. You may see some reactions in your husband that you don’t expect, and you may be able to save your marriage in the process.
Yes... it can. Just like thousands of other couples, you can avoid divorce after an affair by working together through a marriage-healing plan. You follow the right steps... in the right order... and end up with a marriage stronger than it ever was before the infidelity.
Recent studies show divorce doesn't make women happier. And besides that, if you never work through the trust issues caused by the affair you'll later find it impossible to trust the next man you get close to.
This site is dedicated to giving you hope. Let us help you and your husband start your marriage over with a clean slate.