Keisha was devastated. She wanted to get back together with ex boyfriend Martin. Martin had told her that he needed some “space.” Martin said that he still cared for her but didn’t want to date exclusively any more.
What should Keisha do to get back together with ex Martin? Should she call him and text him? Should she show up and flirt with his friends? Should she ignore him completely?
Actually, she should do none of these. Instead, she should listen to him.
He says that he loves her but that he needs space. While this may seem like a cliche, the truth is that many times when people use this line they mean what they say.
Sometimes a relationship just gets ahead of a person. They may not be ready for the responsibilities a relationship carries. But that doesn’t mean that they don’t love their ex. In fact, they may love him or her too much and want to take a step back.
Given that this is the case, let’s take a look at what disasterous things can happen if you handle the situation badly.
For instance, if Keisha were to endlessly pursue Martin with calls, emails and texts, she wouldn’t be giving him the space he needed to get his head on straight. Letters, gifts, and singing songs under his window late at night would have the same effect.
One of Keisha’s friends suggested that she start flirting with all of Martin’s friends to make him jealous in an attempt to get back together with ex. This is a common recommendation because it is assumed that men will want what other men have. The problem is that by playing games now, Keisha would be jeopardizing her relationship in the future. And, there is a strong likelihood that Martin would just be angry at Keisha and push her even further away.
Another option Keisha considered was just ignoring him altogether. In some ways, because she was so hurt by Martin’s rejection, she wanted to punish him in turn.
But, if she is open and receptive but not pushy when they meet each other in social situations that are not contrived, she shows him what a wonderful woman and wonderful human being she is. She becomes someone that he wants to spend time with. She has allowed him to see her at her best.
Keisha has a number of options if she wants to get back together with ex. But, her best option is simply to listen to Martin. He’s said he needs space. So, she should give it to him. She should let him have the opportunity to decide whether to get back together.
My guess is that Martin will come back to Keisha and he’ll be ready to take the relationship to the next level. If Keisha plays her cards right, she will have a stronger relationship overall.
That’s how to get back together with an ex in a healthy way.
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